Those were the days when I moved to my own flat in a green lush village by name Pragathi Nagar in the near suburbs of Hyderabad. Then, I felt there is a place on this earth where humans can breathe. Then, the village was slowly adopting the culture of urbanization. Then, the supermarkets, juice shops and corner stores are invading nature...

One fine day, my elder daughter and I walked into a newly opened supermarket to buy some groceries. As the store was being filled with stuff, it is filled with sound acoustics. By picking some chocolates, my daughter was openly expressing what is good for health and what is junk. She is busy expressing in English, and I was busy searching for what I want to buy. Meanwhile, a strange person walked to us by looking at my daughter and started a conversation. For around ten minutes, the discussion was on what school she is studying, where the school is, how I selected the school and lots more about my daughter and what made her so openly talk and express.

Later, I met this strange person couple of times in a saloon, corner store before we became friends. A few days later, we both with our families met in a newly opened fresh juice shop in the village. Soon, we turned to be family friends. He decided to join his daughter in the same school where my daughter is. This family friendship evolved and expanded until our better halves started sharing their recipes and cooked food. Both our daughters joined the same Abacus tuition too.

Days passed and this thick friendship brought some disturbances; we humans err. Sometimes, I thought, I am not mature enough to understand his expressions. Sometimes, I felt he is not correct. These emotions were much supported; when my wife came to know more about him from his wife. 

The day has come for me to move the UK along with my family leaving my own new flat, new car, new television etc. Though I was a bit hesitant to take this decision, was also not sure how many months I will be living in the UK - uncertainty in the assignment duration. I informed very few of my friends on this life event. One being the stranger turned friend turned family friend turned confused soul. He with his family visited me on the day we left India to the UK. We were in touch for the first few months after we moved to the UK. Later, new people and new friendships made my wife and me forget their family. A few months later, WhatsApp made my wife get in touch with his wife and again started getting to know each other’s lives... 

After five years, I returned to the same house, started using the same car, repaired the broken favourite television but have not invested time to fix the old friendship. I have my own reasons; this fellow did not inform me that he moved to Singapore leaving his family in India and many few more such silly reasons. However, he kept visiting his family in India now and then. He never bothered to meet me nor I did put effort. 

One fine day, his wife came to our house inviting us for some ladies function. He drove his car to my house but he did not bother to come to my flat to see me, though he knows that I am in my house. The little hero in me, EGO played an action scene and made me sit in the house. After that moment, I never felt sorry for the act I did. 

Days passed, only my wife visited his house for the ceremony his wife invited us. He stayed in India for a couple of weeks and left back to Singapore. After a week or so after he left, my wife called his wife to have a chat. Minutes after, I got a call from my wife with reverberating voice, grief, confusion in it. "Ajay is no more... “, with utter shock, "... he died of a heart attack in his flat in Singapore. Anitha seems mentally disturbed; she is laughing and crying to say that she should lead the rest of her life without him."

Two years passed I returned from the UK and more than four times he visited India, I never put effort meeting him in-person. Now, who won? The EGO in me or Me?

Managing emotions is key.
Value people. Leadership starts from leading self.

Written on 30th November 2019

Please drop your comments at me@killamsetty.in